NEW YEAR. . STILL, THE USUAL ME

New Year to me is a celebration. A celebration, like Christmas, that we family, would be with each other, shopping, preparing the foods and most of all, we’re together to welcome the New Year. There are also things that are to be done during New Year. New things to have, New Year’s resolutions, and other things that make you differ from now to a new one.

As a student and a teen, I also have these resolutions, specifically, endless resolutions as in, no one had ever changed or fulfilled at all. I actually think that I can’t change these attitudes of mine into a nicer or a worse one. It’s so hard, for me to be thrifty so I can save money, be nice so that everyone would be nice at me and be good. Maybe I can say that its hard, but I can still do these things or change them. But the fact is, I can’t really change myself. On the past days until now, I always planned to be different, be serious and a decent man. Even not allowing myself to have joy and happiness just for that. But I really found out that this is so hard for a guy like me. Again, I can’t really change myself. This usual self of mine, I think, will be forever. Being a stupid and an idiot, even like that, is just me. I’m me and the usual me. And this new year, it would always be THE USUAL ME.

OUR MOTHER TONGUE, OUR POWER

     Language defines the type of person we are generally and it has had an effect on our choices as well as our lifestyle. Language has become our way of seeing life in a different perspective. It has everything, our culture, our family and even our home.

     As a student, I can’t just resist myself to become ambitious and love other language, feeling high in speaking it and looking down on the language that I usually use. This is just a trait of me and even many people in this country. We didn’t knew, its importance to us. In other places, it is just like a shame if I use it because for many, they seem to react weird just like asking themselves “What are they saying?”. This is the main cause of out anxieties in speaking our mother tongue. But I just realized, there’s nothing wrong. This is our form of speaking and most of all, our trademarks. The honors this language gave to us, products of this language, presidents who use this language and who became president with this mother tongue. It made me say that without language, one is voiceless, with imperfect language, one is perceived as imperfect, and with standard language, one is superior, at least from the perspectives of those who possess the standard command of language.

     Language is many things: the arrangement of words in a particular order, uttered in a certain way, denoting a certain meaning; it is a political instrument which evokes images and motion. The learning of one's mother tongue will provide an individual the right to study their culture and will also preserve family bonds and lessen cultural conflicts between generations. Language gave honor to us, we ILOCANOs in the Philippines and in the world.

LOVE - - - THE TRUE ESSENCE OF CHRISTMAS

Everyone wants Christmas to be meaningful. Christmas is definitely the season for gifts and giving. During Christmas, a lot of people go to malls to buy various gifts to be given to their friends and loved ones. People just need to spend more during Christmas season but most of them have their own purposes and that is to give. Give gifts and give love to their fellow and most of all, to their loved ones.

Since June, I had also planned something about this Christmas. Especially when my arm was broken and I was that hopeless for it. It undergone surgery and it was so hard for me but someone lend their hands to help me. They never stop to call me, ask about my situation and even visiting me here at Vigan just to see me and my injury. They are actually my savior and they are my parents.

Well, this Christmas I actually planned for a gift for them. Because of all they did for me. I am thinking of many gifts or a special gift. Maybe a something for parents, a ring or a cake. But the problem is MONEY. . . ! I did so thrifty through these times because of that gift. I even tried not having my merienda at school  just to save enough money for them. But what I did, or what I am supposed to do is to ask money to them and just add my savings and whatever what I’d save, that can be enough for a gift. I just realized that gifts are not only at material things but in the love within it and that love may be most enough for them.

Honestly, when I will be giving that gift, I am that anxious because it’s my first time ti give a gift for them. I first wrote a letter to them, unexpectedly, they were so happy and that made them to give me a hug. That inspired me to be confident for what I would be giving. But it doesn’t matter. What matters is at least, I gave a gift for them, which I can be considering special. Because anything that I will be giving to them even how cheap it is, as love flows within it can be considered special.

Love means making time for others, even if you end up with fewer gifts and less than perfect Christmas events. The less you clutter your Christmas season, the more time you’ll have for what’s really important, what really matters, the essence of Christmas----love!.

EQUAL RIGHTS, EQUAL DIFFERENCES

     On the past decades, we all know that men have more rights than women. They were more powerful, they can just turn women into toys as well as slaves. And honestly, I don't have any regret of that because of my gender, I'm a boy and I know, I have all the advantages of being it. But of course, even if how selfish I am, I also have conscience. Thinking of it makes my pity for women and suddenly, I realized that my thinking was wrong. The advantage, and inequality that I taught before was wrong. GOD MADE US ALL EQUAL.

     On the other phase of life, we almost achieved that equality. We were all living in a simple life w/ the same type of life. But ever since materials came up, jewelries, gold, silver and sinful money, this equality faded. Humanity was divided into two, rich and poor. Realizing it makes a disadvantage in me because they're my fellow, the poor ones. And its obvious, rich people are on the top while we poor, are seeking help for the rich that made us always in the bottom. I pity on us and at the same time anger when i see people starving, sleeping on the streets, dying. It's just like, just because of we're poor and always at the bottom, that doesn't mean that they would abandon us and continue their selfish works. They forgot what they nature is. All of them came from rugs to riches. All of us created by our God, are ALL EQUAL.

GOoD - GOD

     Being bad is my nature through these times. I frequently do more bad things than doing good things. I knew this because I was recalling all my deeds as I write on my journal daily. And when I recall those, it was just a smile on my face and a question "When can I be different?"..

     I am thinking of myself as a very sinful man. But I just realized, even if how sinful I am, i can still do good things on my own ways. Maybe, i think much on the sins that I've done and get overwhelmed by my conscience.Honestly, I seldom pray for the forgiveness of those sins and promise that I would lessen those. And sometimes, I was able to do right and fulfill that promise. I can do good things even if how simple that is. All sins are forgiven by the eternal mercy of God. And my faith is doing GOOD is one step closer to GOD. And I believe, that being good, even how simple it is, makes difference in me.